Looking Back
The week between Christmas and New Years feels like an added gift under the tree. Like a breath. A time to take things slow. Loosen the routine you have been holding on to for the last 51 weeks.
For many it is a time to look ahead to the New Year. To evaluate and make goals. To make plans and dream big dreams. A new year is a new start, and on January 1st they want to hit the ground running.
Not me so much. To me the week between Christmas and New Years is an opportunity to split your time between the present and the past. To be fully present in all that you are doing, not worrying about a deadline, or a work schedule. To fit in visits with cherished friends, or put your phone away altogether and not leave your house.
But even in the present, it’s important to make some room for the past.
It feels important to look back and remember. Not to rush ahead to what’s next. The easier choice may be to look ahead. Because the future is full of empty spaces to be filled. Of course we would want to make a plan to fill them with all the very best things. To leave no room for the bad. To avoid the hard and difficult. To crowd out any chance of failure.
The past is already written. The past 365 days had really amazing moments. It had wins and successes. But I am betting that there were also hard days. Loss, failure, and insecurity. Maybe sickness. THings that you did not include in your vision plan for the year 365 days ago.
Life has a way of throwing in some curveballs. But before we rush on to the next thing, there may be even more value to looking back. To allow ourselves to see it all with hindsight. To celebrate all the good, and acknowledge the difficult. Maybe even finally allow ourself to grieve, if even for a minute.
The past may look different than it did when it was present. More of the story may have emerged in the following weeks. Maybe the Lord revealed a little more of the why as it all unfolded. Maybe it brought growth or repentance. Maybe the difficult brought you to your knees in the presence of the Savior.
Sometimes looking back allows us to see the sweetness in those things we thought might break us at the time.
It also allows us to sometimes see the beauty in things that we didn’t even notice. A friend you made. Something that seemed insignificant, but now feels special.
Even if you did not feel like this year had a lot of High highs or any low lows, you can see the beauty in the rhythm of the year. You can see provision in the steadiness. Protection in what feels like mundane. Gratitude for richness of a routine.
Looking back is important. We can’t write the future. We have to wait patiently on it to unfold. But we can remember. We can do 2019 the honor of finishing it well. Of giving it the consideration it deserves.
Because in remembering, I hope you most of all see God’s hand. You remember His faithfulness. You recognize His mercy. You see all the ways that he was for you in the past year. Maybe the past decade.
To many the point of New Years is to make goals for the next year. To make sure that you are better by the end of it.
But in all the known of a coming year, the thing I need to do is to remember. To remember God. To remember all the ways that He has never left me. Never let me be put to shame. All the ways that He has been patient and gracious in the inevitable failures. All the ways He has carried me through every season.
There will be time to make goals in January. In December I need the quiet stillness to thank God for who He has been, and to trust Him for what He will do.
Moses said it best in Exodus 33 when, “And he said to him, “If your presence will not go with me, do not bring us up from here.”
Thankfully we know He will in fact go with us. And no matter what it brings, His presence will make it beautiful.
